Confessions of an Idllyic Mind

Alright i shall expose one of my worse habits to you avid readers of my blog now. I often .. often .. often ... Now b4 a stream of dirty thoughts run through your head, I would like to put a halt to those thoughts and confess that I often read in bed b4 I sleep. Haha. I know its not a big deal but to an ophthalmologist, I'm an absolute nightmare. First of all i have an eye birth defect - aestematigsm - which would require me to wear glasses at all times when reading - I dont. I'm required to sit upright when reading - I lie down. I'm also required to read in good lighting - I dim the lights. So yeah that's my bad habit. Which i dont plan to change unless i go partially blind.

My current b4-sleep read is The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards. In this novel, the main character, David and his wife, Norah were expecting. When his wife gave birth, in which he was the emergency gynae, they had no idea that they were having twins (the story was set in the 1960s and 70s). So when he pulled out a perfect baby boy he thought that was it. But he then delivered a baby girl. She was born with down syndromes. Afraid that his wife would not be able to cope with the emotional stress of bringing up a down's baby, he immediately gave the baby to his nurse, Caroline. Caroline was told to bring the baby to an institution right away but after looking at the poor condition of the institution she decides to keep the baby, Phoebe. David then told his wife that their baby girl was a still born. Caroline brought the baby as her own. To know what happened to Phoebe and the rest of the crew, ask me or buy the book.

After reading this book over and over again (another habit of mine), i began to think about David's actions. His want, need, strive for perfection in this case, a perfect family, caused much grieve and strain to his relationship with his wife in the end. What is with the world and it's need for perfection these days? Skinny girls working out in the gym and having lipo, 30 yr olds getting botox and a face lift, etc etc ... Aren't you just glad that you were born anatomically correct? All the other nitty gritty stuff dont really matter. So what if there are a few fine lines or if you have let urself go a bit? There is nothing that a better diet and exercise cant do to improve ur situation. The plastic surgeons would advice you otherwise i'm sure. In my opinion perfection use to mean the highest degree of proficiency, skill, or excellence, as in some art. Now its a blur of a word. An ambiguous word. A vague word. Someone may think that they are perfect but once they see the latest cover of Cosmo that would all change. The beauty industry is a major kaching kaching industry these days. I would love to have my thighs shrunked and my tummy tucked. But if i'm gonna turn into a Courtney Love, Joan Rivers and Melanie Griffith combo (surgery freaks) then no thank you. I'll live with my elephantitis/thunder/Maradona thighs, and my wobbly jell-o tummy and be grateful to be still alive and attractive (self perception).

Learn to love yourself people ! ! !